WELL, YOU NOSY LITTLE TURD. WHAT DID THE TITLE SAY? OR, DID YOU EVEN TAKE THE TIME TO READ THE TITLE? CURIOSITY KILLED THE CAT, YOU KNOW. LUCKILY, YOU'RE NOT A CAT. BUT THAT IS A VAGUE STATEMENT. MAYBE YOUR CURIOSITY KILLED SOMEONE ELSE'S CAT. JUST THINK, HALFWAY ACROSS THE GLOBE, LITTLE 5-YEAR-OLD TATYANA IS PETTING HER KITTEN, FLUFFY, WHEN SUDDENLY, IT DROPS DEAD. SHE FREAKS OUT AND STARTS CRYING, RUNS OUT INTO THE STREET, GETS PLOWED BY A SEMI TRUCK, WHICH IN TURN JACKNIFES INTO A NEARBY HOUSE, TAKING OUT THE FIRE HYDRANT, MAKING IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR THE FIRE DEPARTMENT TO PUT THE FIRE OUT. NOW, EVERYBODY(THOSE STILL ALIVE) IS FRANTIC, NOBODY CAN DO ANYTHING BUT ARGUE AND GET FRUSTRATED. IN THE MIDST OF THIS CHAOS, ONE OF THE FIREMEN FLIPS OUT AND STARTS HITTING PEOPLE; ANYONE WITHIN RANGE...,AN OLD LADY DROPS, THEN HER HUSBAND, AND A DOG (A REALLY SMALL, HELPLESS DOG). HIS CO-WORKERS TRY TO TACKLE HIM, BUT HE ESCAPES, JUMPS IN THE FIRETRUCK AND SPEEDS INTO THE CITY, WHERE HE THEN PROCEEDS TO BLARE THE HORN AND SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF TWO WINDOW WASHERS ON A SCAFFOLD 17 STORIES UP. THEY FALL, ONE NAILS A HOT DOG VENDOR, WHO AT THE TIME WAS SERVING AN IMPORTANT POLITICIAN A FOOTLONG WITH MUSTARD AND RELISH. THIS PARTICULAR POLITICIAN WAS SUPPOSED TO DELIVER A MESSAGE OF PEACE TO THE PRESIDENT. THE LETTER READ,"DEAR SIR, WE ARE OF NO THREAT, WE WANT NOTHING BUT THE BEST RELATIONS BETWEEN US". BUT SOME OF THE MUSTARD SMEARED HALF OF THE NOTE. INSTEAD, THE LETTER READ,"I HATE U".NOW, THE PRESIDENT IS PISSED. HE NUKES 'EM. THEIR ALLIES RETURN THE FAVOR, BUT MISS BY A LONG SHOT, SENDING THE NUKE INTO SPACE. IT SOON CATCHES UP TO THE MOON, BLOWS IT IN HALF, AN TOTALLY F***S UP THE GRAVITY BACK ON EARTH. NOW, EVERYBODY WEIGHS 3 TIMES MORE THAN THEY USED TO, AND FALL INTO A SUICIDAL STATE OF DEPRESSION. SOON THE ENTIRE PLANET OFFS THEMSELVES, AND IS ONCE AGAIN RULED BY MONKEYS. EVOLUTION HAS JUST TOOK A 2 MILLION YEAR LEAP BACKWARDS. WHY? BECAUSE YOU HAD TO READ THIS. WAY TO GO. SEE YOU IN 2 MILLION MORE YEARS, JERK.